Posts Tagged ‘funny’

Congratulations C.A. & Rania…

February 12th, 2010

Haiiiih! Hampa readers tok sah dok pikiaq bukan2 nah! Bukan Akak say congrats kat C.A. and Rania Escova Potpurinova tu, pasai depa nikah kawen bersanding naik pelamin diarak mathergajah bagai yer. Ooo kalau sebut congrats to two names, semestinya the two names are joined in marriage ley? Mana leh macam tu… and mana leh C.A. and Rania disatukan – sapa yang nak jadi top nanti? Mati la Akak dah bayangkan Rania pose pose “Wanna be on top?” dia yang famous se-Kedah ni, ops!

Hehehe and so if that’s not issue, then what? Kan? Ha… mrasalah…

Congratulasi yang pertama diucapkan kaedahnye kapada C.A. yang telah memulakan tugas barunya as… errr… as ape tah u ols cakap kat hem yesterday? Chief/ Head Chef? Matila DATO Chef Wan ditempelengnye CA, kan CA? Dinch perlu berDato’ bagai for u ols to be lead cook/ head chef baga di, errr… apa again nama otel tu? Mati la sms kegumbiraan CA yang katanya di hantar and reported as “SMS -SENT” to hp Akak, percaya la u ols, sampai ke hari sampai ke sudah tak der pa per pon ok. Thats why Akak macam tercengang the time you came to my office and tanya me about your sms tu – sebab Akak tak dapat… And then the truth came – Akak yang OVERLOOKED C.A.’s sms. Ya Ampun C.A.!!! Hiks, your sms tu, it was actually ada dalam inbox but Akak probably canceled the notification for new sms because Akak got irritated dengan sms sms busuk MAXIS dok hantar free tu la, join ni la, add tu ini la kan. So cam tu la kaedahnye. And with that, maka, Akak OVERLOOKED! Ops!

So anyways, back to C.A. – mrasalah, keja leklok nah, kat bustanihotel.com (Ha, ingat dah nama hotel tu – Bustani Hotel… Hehehe). Knowing CA the way I do, Akak pasti hampa2 pun akan sama jer macam Jgn gadoh2 dengan bini/ laki boss tau… jgn sentap ngan mak sedara dan sepupu kepada si owner yang katanya taste sangats tu (tunggu, hang tunggu. sit not sit “DOK TAK DUDOK” la tu… kan CA? Hiks!), hang tunggu! Esok jugak mak buat lawatan rasmi merasmikan hotel baru katanya anak syarikat dibawah naungan Hotel Seri Malaysia itiew… bkanka? :D Tahniah again yer CA. Akak doakan u ols kekal, kerja dihotel yang once upon a time suatu ketika tak lama lebih kurang 7, 8, years ago, was actually the erm… Pejabat Tanah Jitra ka apa ke tah… kan? :)

bustanihotel
Bustani Hotel - the website yang under construksi tau! Bukannye the hotel tu ok. Hotel tu dosi beroperasi yer...
Bustani Hotel – the website yang under construksi tau! Bukannye the hotel tu ok. Hotel tu dosi beroperasi yer…

Ok so that’s the “oh-congratulation-dear-friend” dedicated buat CA.

Now lets move on to the “oh-congratulaseeyon-sistarrr-for-the-great-clip” type of congratulations, katanya, hikhikhik (PS: Rania o Rania… jgn ditanya mana Akak dapat vid ni; siapa yang rakam; dan siapa yang bgi kat i ols, sebab semuanya Akak jawab – entah? LOL! Pun begitu, what I do know is that I don’t have to set up any spy cams or webcam ke, camera phone bagai dah lepas ni sebab dah dapat dah what I was looking for/ wanted to make this entry a reality… wah… giiitu la bahasa katanya! LOL!

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Kaedahnye, before that, Akak just perlu add video yang hat bawah ni dulu. Sebab the next video after this, ada kaitannye. Kaitannye ape? Hahahaha… you’ll see…

Ngangis tak? Clust kan? Noo… Ini belom perlu nangis lagi… belom boleh dikatakan sebagai “CLUST” lagi ok! Video selepas ni lagi nangisss ok! Lagi clust ok! Laaagi… eh, dah kul brapa ni – time for a wholesome breakfast! (Sambil mengambil plastic biru berkandungan 5 bungkuih nasi lemak; thanks Jeebsion for membelinya sebanyak 6, I tot u were kind sebab I asked to beli 4 u bought 6. So sweet. And alih2 I decided to become sweeter, maka, I will eat 5 and spare u 1. Nah? OPS!) Ok now, enuff details for breakfast, mrasalah time to cabut lari dulu before Akak Rania serang I ols! LARI!!!!!!!!!!

Right click here, save link/ file as
(FYI, its a 3gp filetype yer… ) and lepas dah save/ download, mrasalah view lah dengan your players.
Kalau tak leh view, please report ye dalam komentar. Akak shall do my best to kasik hampa semua boleh jugak tgk clip Rania terulung ini! Matilamak!

PS again: Rania! Woits! Bukan Akak tau yang taruh nama file tu like that nah. As Akak dapat from hp sapa tah, dah memang di namankan as Gila. Tapi memang Gila pun. Gila clusssssssttt pose pose tarian itiew!!! Hahahaha…

The new SUPERHERO with OVERPOWERED superpowers…

February 11th, 2010

KAN!?! Kaedahnye, if like this lar, I think my personal stylist & artistique team, combinaseeyon of Fie, Volks & Kak Vee (Suddenly I got the idea naming the three of u ols, “Le Veefievolks”, grand kan? Hiks!) mampu do more betterer granderer outfits, don’t you think so Drizella??? (Referring to Miss Róisín Murphy ni ler… hiks! Owh and if Drizella pun hampa dinch hui siapakah, mrasalah find out – Google-lah dikau for Drizella, Click here)

Annnyways, mrasa, back to our new superhero with overpowered supersupapowa (haha tringat Akak kat si pompuan sorang tu dalam Power Root punye advert itiew… “Trima kasih POWARUT”!)

Roisinmurphy
Oh Miss Róisín Murphy huneyyy... The pink cororrr, I loike!!! But the poodle-like design and the latex gloves, in broad daylite, its a horrorrr! Hiks!

Oh Miss Róisín Murphy huneyyy… The pink cororrr, I loike!!! But the poodle-like design and the latex gloves, in broad daylite, its a horrorrr! Hiks!

Waittt wait! There’s one more! Hiks!

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Aiyoh! Please don’t save me, dear Superhero! Your bad outfit alone can kill me dah already! Hiks!

Roisinmurphy 2
Aiyoh! More like SUPERHORROR dari SUPERHERO, kan? LOL! Tringat pulak aku Wicked Witch Of The West... eh, ke East tah? Yang telah dibottomizedkan (Ops!) oleh Dorathy of Kansas dalam citer Wizard of Oz tu, bkanka? LOL!

Aiyoh! More like SUPERHORROR dari SUPERHERO, kan? LOL! Tringat pulak aku Wicked Witch Of The West… eh, ke East tah? Yang telah dibottomizedkan (Ops!) oleh Dorathy of Kansas dalam citer Wizard of Oz tu, bkanka? LOL!

And the shoes – my god! LOL! I would die with it… WITH IT yer, not I would die FOR IT! Hiks!

See photo, tringat kawan2? Or see kawan2, tringat these photos?

February 10th, 2010

I suppose in Akak’s condition kan, yang bagaikan jauh macam dok kat bulan nih, walhal cerok utara ja noh, punya la payah nak jumpa kawan2 katanya. Hiks! Anyways, mati la ayat pertama entry ni tak habis lagi – *SAMBUNG* Bagi Akak yang dok jauh ni, kondisi Akak would be the earlier one – tgk gambar, tringat kawan2… (Errr sape yang tringat kawan2, terus bukan album tebal 500 pages melapik-alaskan gambar2 yang berframe ‘Kodak’ warna putih now turn kuning akibat keusangan? Ade… sape? Hehehe meka2 yang dah tua la! Hiish!)

Anyways, enuff mrapu – now continuing to Akak punye short posting kali ni. Now, what photos? Hehehe… mrasalah… THESE PHOTOS!

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THESE photos… tetiber Akak tertengok, lantas teringatkan Hooks the Kapitan & also si Volksie, biarpun now dinch Volkswagen and berpaling-tadah-bertukar kepada VIVA (tetap “V”, kan? Hehehe… padan la u leh ngam ngan Kak Vee! Kan? Hiks!)

Valeri-Gaduh
Valeri Hooksiah, what are you DOING!!?!?! No, you ols bukan yang tgh korek idung tu! Mak tringatkan kau, bila tgk yang kat belah kiri pic yang kecik comei lotei temetot muka ala ala lebih kurang u ols aje! Hiks! Gaduh pasai pa ni - takut laaa!!! Haha!

Hehehe… and Volksie, apa kes???

Volksie
Volksie, motif u ols ada kembar seiras, i ols dinch tau langsung!?! Pandainye dia semunyikkan identity kembars yiew itiew... hikhik!

Hehehehe macam macam la kan? Hikhok!

PS: FIFI, CA, kawan2 len2, harap bersabar yer. Your time will come, bile Akak dah ketemui la kan pix2 yang membuatkan Akak teringatkan u ols berdua… Lalalalaa…

Matila its all about “Bercakap”, “Banyak” dan “B….”

February 9th, 2010

Hahaha I wonder what’s with the last “B” word tu, kan? Hahahaha die la issue sensitivities! LOL!

Ini video pertama ni kisahnye pasal – BERCAKAP… BANYAK… hiks! Die lar yang bercakap banyak tu sebenarnye yang perlukan a RETAINER! Hiks!

And then, there’s this BABY yang also BANYAK (walaupun tak paham motif dan apa yang dicakapkannye itiew la kan) BERCAKAP dengan BAPAKnye… hiks!

And then, finally, this “B”… lalala…

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See why Akak save this last B and vid for last? Mati la jijiques!!! LOL!!!

Kezitau, kan!?! Mati la ada satu blog ni buat entry pasal video ni jugak, dengan titlenya “BILA PONDAN TAK TAU MALU” or something like that la kot. HAHAHAHA betul tu! Akak pun rasa nak pelempang jer bapok ni! HAHAHA

Dan tiber tiber…

February 5th, 2010

As Akak was doin’ Akak nye usual web browsing, searchin’ for stuffs and what not bagai, bagi tujuan personal dan jugak kerje la katanya, Akak dengan tak semena2 terbeliak bijik mata di kala mata dah mula sayu kusu layu bagai kan… terus fresh katanya! LOL!

Kaedahnye… motif??? Bahasa apakah iniew???

iKonek
Ngeh ngeh ngeh

See I told u – mula mula iPod. Then iPhone. Then now iPad. Ha, yang LEBIH now, mrasalah – iKonek! Hiks!

Hmmm… Ini srupa kes kaedahnye macam Akak gi Istanbul dulu tu – ingat? Kes kedai namanya ZAKAR tapi jual karpet ka, barang kemas tah? Ha… ini also same same kes la kot, kan? Bahasa Istanbul ke? Ops! (Mati la WikiP*ki katanya, kan? LOL!)

Happy Weekendings semua! Muahs!

Yesterday geram, today also geram!

February 4th, 2010

Kan? Dua tiga menjak ni kan, asik2 citer pasal geeeeeeeeeram aje, kan? LOL!

Anyways, today’s topic geram tak der kaitan pasal demonstrasi bagaimanakah nak geram cara sawan babs katanya kan, hehehe… Hari ni issue bile geram dengan kucing bangsat tepi2 jalan yang suka2 hati mai nak curik makanan anak2 kucing kite lah, mai masuk laman umah kita suka2 hati MELABUR lah, mai ke umah kite tunjuk samseng lah… haaa, hari ni all pasal geram dengan kucing2 style2 cam tu. (PS: Manjaboy, Comelgirl, Baby and Adik – awas yer! Jangan kasik Mama naik hantian dengan hampa tau, haaa… nanti Mama buat laguni kat hampa baru tau! And lepas tu, baruuuu lah sesuai tetiber si Volksie akan hadapkan muka Akak ni kat SPCA, kan Volksie kan? LOL!)

Haaa… tudiah!

PS: Tapi kalau dok tak dudok hampa sengaja dok buat hal cam ni kat kucing2 kesayangan hampa, saja2 jer tak der keje, tu namanya hampa pendera tau! Akak tak kenal hampa tau! Lalalala… Now where’s that Chichi! Chichi?!! Meh sini! Come lets play with selofen tape meh meh! Maaati lah Jeebsion pukul aku pulak lepas tu! HAHAHA!

Wannna see cemana bile Akak geram kat office!?!

February 3rd, 2010

These past few days kan since the last post Akak blogged pasal the ever so pelik iPad tu (ish! iPad la pulak – what will they think of next? iBra? Ops!), Akak have been very stressed tau at work, busy not to mention, and plus, at times, very der very geram ya amats tau; at times with the work itself, at times with si Jeebsion tu (OPS!) and at time, just geram dengan ChiChi (si Jeebsion nye cat – and not to mention dengan si Comel gigirl tu jugak – lepas2 branak jer, makin mengada! Haha!).

And just this afternoon, I got to know about this video yang Akak rasa sangatlah sesuai dijadikan panduan untuk anda2 yang nak tgk cemana gayanya when Akak naik hantian naik geram brabuk and very der upsets! Mrasa la terus Akak uploadkan this video, buat tatapan semua, so that kalo ado yang tetiber sengaja carik pasal nak kasik Akak naik hantian, ha, awas…! Hehehe…

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It will be something like this lar…

And when Akak said something like this tu, I really meant ’something like this aje’ occayyy… and bukan exactly like this tau!

Ko kenapa tetiber nak speku bile Akak naik hantian sawan jer, meradang ngamok bagai jer, Akak terus2 aje feeling2 nak sumbatkan remote controls ke lublub jubs Akak – Ko gile?!!! Ada banyak menatang lain lagi boleh Akak gunakan, alih2 nak guna remote control?!! Habis tu nak tgk tv/ pasang music kat stereo (whatever remote control that is la kan, hehehe) dengan apenye kalau dah disumbatkan ke dalam lubs2 jubs Akak ni ha? Hahahah!

Never coba bring warga Emas naik keta like this nah…

November 22nd, 2009

UPDATED: Mrasa, after u ols toggle the (Show/ hide rest of post content) itiew, now got two videos. The second one tu yang LEBIH precise and complete – the first one tu vusuks, sebab depa cut the most important msg of all from the vid… yes… regarding the point where it is not normal for a woman to drive like that… a woman who promised to take ol’ folks asal2 nya nak gi picnic, alih2, nahhh, ado!?! Hahahah!

Somemore… if you’re on a record-breaking or making attempt, never ok! NEVER bawak orang2 tua togezer²…

If they don’t puke, they would probably do somesthings else to make your attempt, FAIL! Hiks!

Never ok, never… hehehe. Poor ol’ folks – Akak kesian hat yang strapped dok kat center seat tu – the seat belt tu bagaikan nak belitkan leher dia aje, kan? Hahahaha! And Akak sronok how dia charuts the lady driver tu… somewhat somesthings like this…

It’s not normal for woman to drive like this… It’s not normal!!!

Hahahaha I swear to God when she said that, Akak instantly thought of pemandu2 pelesits seperti… yes… Rania Escova… OPS!

This is the updated version/ video yang lebih complete – mrasa!

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Hehehe… “That’s all…” LOL!

Apelarrr yang nak di’sentap’kan also I donno lar…

September 27th, 2009

Akak came across these clips like a few weeks ago, just, tapi rasenye the clips dah online diuploadkan for quite sometimes dah pun, kat YouTube. And I fell in lovvveee with this QUEmar, not KUmar tau! Hehehehe… Very brilliant I tell you, I was laughing my ass off watching this QUEmar buat jokes. And speaking of jokes katanya, got some comments I was reading kat YouTube tu, ade kononnye Malaysians yang sentap dengan jokes si Quemar nih, particularly pasai dia sebut bab Malaysia la, ape tah… ade dalam part 1, check out at Akak rasa at 6 minutes 25 seconds point in the video, and for Akak lah, Akak rasa, my God! Bengapnye sape yang dok komen² katanya dia terase dengan jokes tu ala ala menghina Malaysia and Malaysians. Hello – I also Malaysian? (Akak also pegang status kerakyatan Venezuelan, and Mexican, and South African, and Colombian… and, erm, hmmm mane lagi negara yang Akak dah harumkan namanya dalam persada ratu²anchanteks eh? Owh ha – also, Dominican Republic as well as Curaçao) Anyways, ha, Akak also Malaysian, ado traso? Akak dinch nampak any solid reason untuk buatkan Akak sentap tau! Buat aku ketawa sampai nak terkucil, ado la… kan?

Watch part 2 and 3 right after the jump. Mrasa…

So now tell Akak, selain from the jokes overall to be lite² lucah and some yang kite tak paham WTF is this Quemar talking, joking about (because those people yang dia mentioned tu, semuanya Singaporean politicians and etc. kan), still, Akak rasa, takder satu pun yang directly menghina or menjatuhkan Malaysia, well, kalau ade tu pun, alahai, CIPUT jer. Pon begitu, itu jer ke sebab korang yang menyentap tu nak sentap about these clips? Ish. I tell u want. Go la bukak mata serta kapla hotak hampa tu luas² dulu and then tgk balik these clips of excellent example of standup comedian doing his job! Enuff said, now, mrasalah Akak nak tonton semiewla clips² nih, for, erm, God knows brapa puluh kali dah tatau! Hahaha… I love the merlion joke thingy… bodoh tau! Tapi suke lah! HAHAHAHAHA…

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